Weird Weekend
by ZeroIXResoleon
Summary: Ragna's weird weekend seems to keep getting weirder. One Shot Fanfiction. Gag Reel to Life's Stimulant.


Hello, everybody! LegnaResoleon here and welcome to my first One Shot Fanfiction since the first of August!

This Fanfiction is a Gag Reel to Life's Stimulant. Therefore, it's going to take place in the universe of Life's Stimulant.

This is a treat to everyone who reviewed for Life's Stimulant and New Leaf! But also, this is a scene that was unable to be used in the real story so I decided to make it the series Gag Reel!

Warning: This is not suitable for people under the age of twelve. So if you're sensitive and have a good feeling what's coming up, I suggest you get off the Fanfiction right now. Other than that, enjoy yourself!

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**Ragna The Bloodedge Short Story: Weird Weekend**

Inside the room of an apartment, is a high school student named Ragna. He was laid out on the bed, sleeping peacefully. It wasn't long however, that he wakes to the morning sun that shone on his eyes. His bloodshot eyes slowly opened. His head turned to his right to see that it was time to get ready for school, yet again. Only this time…it's not because it's the weekend.

Ragna slowly sits up on his bed and gives out a huge yawn with a stretch. "Wait a minute! It's the weekend! This is when Nu does...not this early. It's a miracle that I woke up this early. Maybe I can play Blazblue before she wakes up! Or maybe...I can have a walk to myself! Either way, I better do it quick or-"

Right on cue, Ragna's sentence is interrupted by the door to his bedroom being whipped opened by none other than Nu. "HIIIYAAAA RAAAAAAAAAAGNA!" Nu yelled with much affection and love.

Ragna looks for a second at Nu with eyes of devastation and starts crying like a huge whiner. "I HAAAAAATTTE YOU!" His devastation soon turns into rage. "You're so annoying! I feel like cutting off your head, shoving it up my brother's ass and shitting all over his face with your head shoved up his ass!"

Nu squealed in happiness. "Oh Ragna! You know that it's an honor if you kill Nu! Too bad you can't do it or you'll have your pants in a knot!"

Ragna's rage soon subsided. He takes a deep breath and starts to talk more calmly. "Never mind, Nu. What do you want? It's the weekend. You don't need to be my wakeup call!"

Nu giggles. "Yes Nu does, silly! We're all hungry and you have to like make the breakfast like right now!"

Ragna's eyes popped. "WHAT? Why the hell is everyone up? It's the freaking weekend! We don't have to go to school!"

Nu's giggling starts to turn into laughter. "But you're the one who can cook the best around here! Your skills are amazing!"

Ragna wanted to relax. He just can't get a break can he? If it wasn't for that last compliment by Nu, he probably would have just sank into bed. But instead, he just chuckled. "Well...you know...I guess I'm pretty amazing, aren't I?"

Nu giggled again, much to his chagrin. He growls. "What the hell is so funny?"

Nu responded with a devious grin. "Why are you stalling for time, Ragna?"

Ragna knew he had been caught. "Damn it. It was worth a shot..."

* * *

So after he did his daily morning routine, he puts on his Sailor Moon shirt and Hatsune Miku pants and makes for the kitchen. Ragna sees Lambda looking grim, once more. Ragna sighed. "Does this have to do with the fish you bought yesterday?"

Lambda responded by showing him the fish bowl with the fish belly-up. Ragna's eyes widened. "What the hell? What happened?"

Lambda's response is to show him the fish food. "Lambda gave the fish a huge supply of food but it apparently killed him."

Ragna's palms his face. "Lambda, you're supposed to give it a little bit of food each day not the whole damn tank!"

Lambda made that dumbfounded glance at her fish bowl. "Oh..."

Ragna sighs. "Remind me to never get a dog or a cat in his apartment..."

Jin's voice sounded "Brother, good morning."

Ragna turns around to see Jin wearing his shirt that said 'I love Yaoi'. "Good morning. Hey! You're not working on anything school related! Finally decided to get some fresh air, eh?"

Jin sighed. "My hand hurts from so much writing."

Ragna is already at the stove, getting ready to make some breakfast. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Nu's voice sounded. "Hiya, Ra-"

Ragna's voice boomed. "Shut...up!"

Nu whines. "But Nu wants a hug!"

Ragna growls as he starts the stove up. "Well, you can't. So shut up!"

Nu starts sniffling. "Ragna! Nu needs it!"

Ragna continued to not even make eye contact with Nu as he prepared the pancake batter. "Cry me a river! Go on! Do it! I'm waiting! Cry! Cry! Cry!"

Nu starts to cry extremely loudly. Jin and Lambda start to cover their ears. As Ragna is pouring the batter on the frying pan, he laughs evilly.

* * *

Later on, during the day, Ragna goes out of his room after submitting his last Fanfiction on the internet. He sees that Jin and Nu were chatting it up. Ragna decided that he should join in. "What are you two talking about?"

Jin sighed. "Nu was just telling me her pirate jokes."

Ragna chuckled. "I know a few of those."

A single eyebrow from Jin rose. "Oh really? Please do tell us."

Ragna thinks to himself for a moment. "Hmm...what do pirates drive?"

Nu raises her hand while jumping up and down. "Ooh! Ooh! I know this one! I know this one! Um...a CARRRRRRRRR!"

Ragna shook his head no.

Jin nudges Nu's shoulder. "This is obviously a trick question-"

Nu signaled Jin to be quiet. "Wait for your turn, Jin! Uh...it's a...helicoptaaaaaaar!"

Ragna chuckled. "No, the drive a ship. Isn't it obvious? Pretty funny, isn't it? Ha, ha, ha! I crack myself up sometimes! Ha, ha, ha!"

An awkward silence happens for about ten seconds. It was broke by Ragna. "A cat I used to own found it funny and he's deaf."

Nu raised her hand again. "Ragna..."

Ragna boomed. "What is it?"

Nu giggled. "Nothing. Nu just felt like annoying you."

Jin silently chuckled at Nu's smart comeback.

Ragna growled. "I saw that smirk, Jin! Don't be a lamer!"

Lambda tapped Ragna's shoulder. Ragna whips his head around to see Lambda looking into his eyes with that moe glance. "Ragna...can Lambda have a moment in private, please?"

Ragna sighed. "What the hell? I'll bite."

* * *

Ragna was in Lambda's room. They were sitting on the bed with Ragna anxiously awaiting Lambda to speak. "Well? What is it, Lambda?"

Lambda's face burns right red while twiddling with her fingers. "Lambda...Lambda...Lambda..."

Ragna had a feeling he knew where this was going. "You're not falling for me, are you?"

Lambda quickly shook her head. "No...no...Lambda...Lambda...Lambda..." Lambda paused one more moment before finally reciting her confession. "Lambda wet herself..."

Ragna's eyes popped. "You what?"

Lambda started to stutter a bit more. "Lambda...thought about a boy...and...Lambda felt something warm. Lambda took a look at what it was and more of it came out."

Ragna's face turned red. "Lambda...you masturbated, whether you meant to or not."

Lambda tilted her head to one side. "Could you explain, Ragna?"

Ranga gulps. _"I'm going to die. Somebody kill me now..."_ "It's when you...think about someone maturely and...like...THINGS happen...you lose control of yourself and you can't get the person out of your head. So much so that your body reacts in the way that yours did." _"Yeah...I think that settles it..." _"And why are you telling me this?"

Lambda twiddles with her fingers as she spoke. "Well...you see...Lambda likes your brother. When Lambda think of him...she starts to crave him..."

If it wasn't enough that Nu is after him, it was even more troublesome that Lambda is after his brother. So...two sisters are after two brothers. Wow... "How pleasant..." Ragna said sarcastically.

Lambda nods. "And...um...Lambda couldn't help herself so Lambda touched that spot...and she felt pleasure. And then...Lambda felt so happy and then...felt herself explode and therefore...got it all over the bathroom..."

Ragna gulps. _"I know I'm going to regret this."_ "You mean to say that you didn't clean it up? Wait a minute, did you even take a shower?"

Lambda shook her head no. "Lambda thought that Ragna wouldn't believe her if she didn't leave the evidence in the bathroom. So could you please check it out? Also...is it okay that Lambda did that?"

Ragna sighs. "From what I understand, it's something every teenager goes through. What counts is how you deal with it. Now that I think about it, I think that it's fine that you told me this."

Lambda gave out a faint smile. "You're so understanding, Ragna."

Ragna returned the smile. "It's okay. Your secret is safe with me..." With that being said, Ragna heads into the bathroom. He turns on the light and sees...the mess that Lambda made inadvertently. His eyes exploded. "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! IT'S EVERYWHERE! LOOK AT-WHAT DID SHE DO? IT'S ALL OVER THE FLOOR! IT'S EVERWHERE! OH MY GOD! SHIT! AAAAAAGGGGGH!"

After that...the weekend just became even weirder for Ragna...

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I hoped you enjoyed the Gag Reel to Life's Stimulant!

**Weird Weekend: End**


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